I am a serious emotional basketcase today. I had a minor freak out this morning about the fact I have to be out of my apartment and drive away from San Diego, Ocean Beach, my home exactly two weeks from today. I’m still not sure if the thought makes me want to laugh hysterically, vomit, or bawl my eyes out. Either way, this song had me doing the latter on my drive home from work. Unsafe, yes but definitely much needed release. I love music and I freaking love hearing the perfect song at the perfect time, there is really nothing like it. I don’t know if this was meant as a love song written to another person but the lyrics and way the song sounds perfectly describe exactly how I feel  about my life right now. So if I have to admit to having a love affair with myself and my life for this feeling to make sense, I’m totally ok with that.

the first star I see may not be a star
we can’t do a thing but wait
so let’s wait for one more
at the time, such clumsy time in deciding if it’s time
i’m careful but not sure how it goes
you can lose yourself in your courage
the mindless comfort grows when I’m alone with my ‘great’ plans.
this is what she says gets her through it:
“if I don’t let myself by happy now then when?
if not now when?”
when the time we have now ends
when the big hand goes round again
can you still feel the butterflies?
can you still hear the last goodnight?
close my eyes and believe wherever you are, an angel for me



This is most definitely my theme song right now. Especially since Here I Go Again seems way too cliche and Dreamlover come rescue me is too pathetic.