Since I left Pattaya last Monday. Two hour bus to Bangkok for two days. Three hour drive to Hua Hin for three days. Five hour drive to Pattaya for one night. Two hour bus to Bangkok for one night. One hour flight to Krabi. I’m exhausted. I feel like I spent half of the last week just trying to get from one place to another. 
Hua Hin Holiday House!

After a short try in Bangkok last Monday and Tuesday, I gladly excepted an invitation from some friends I met in Pattaya to get away to Hua Hin for a couple of days. I actually applied for a couple of jobs there and planned to stop there on my way down south anyways, so it was perfect. It was a really amazing time and my hosts were so accommodating and helpful. The house we stayed in was uh-mazing. It was a bit far from things but I guess everything I needed was at the house. We partied hard, relaxed, ate and drank just the way you should on holiday.  

It was an amazing few days, but by the end of it I was really struggling. I felt stuck. The only thing that uh-mazing house didn’t have was internet. Hi, my name is Katey and I’m a wifi-aholic. Not having internet access gives me minor anxiety, no joke. It’s kind of pathetic. For those 3 days in Hua Hin, I had no car, no internet, nowhere close enough to really walk. My wifi withdrawals were made worse by the fact I didn’t really have a plan after Hua Hin. Well I knew I wanted to go to Southern Thailand. But had nothing planned that would actually get me there. So when the time came to leave Hua Hin, I felt like I had to (begrudgingly) go back to Pattaya. I was not happy about it. I spent two weeks there already, and I didn’t even really like it! I wanted to go do my own thing but without enough resources or knowledge about where to go or what to do, it seemed like my only option. That boxed in feeling brought me to a breaking point. I knew it would happen sooner or later. I’ve adjusted pretty well so far but something had to get to me eventually. Traveling, living out of a suitcase, no home base. It is exhausting on top of frustrating on top of stressful. I’ve met a couple of people on the road that are traveling long term. One girl from Germany was in her 4th month of backpacking, and the other couchsurfer from last week had been traveling since JUNE of LAST year. Good lord I could never do that. I’ve been doing it for a week and can’t deal. My shit is unorganized and I don’t know where half my things are in my suitcase. The strap on my bag broke because it is so damn full and heavy. I haven’t washed my greasy hair in 4 days because I don’t know how to get my shampoo out without taking everything else out too, and thinking about re-packing makes me want to puke. I don’t know the last time I washed the clothes I am wearing and don’t want you to know how awful they smell up close. I can’t wait to be settled somewhere and be able to put my things away. It’s funny. I started this journey because I felt stuck in my apartment, weighed down by all my stuff and wanted to get on the move.  Now, all my things fit into a suitcase and a backpack and I feel stuck without a place to call home. Not exactly what I anticipated and I am going to have to figure this one out soon before I lose my mind. Looks like I can run but I just can’t hide from whatever makes me feel this way.